May 17, 2011; 3:15 pm

Hello. I've finally got the guts to write in this again. Please excuse my language, but because of my minuscule knowledge of vocabulary, all I can say is that it's been one hell of a week. I'm not going to write about it because I don't really want to remember any of it. All I will tell myself is that whenever I begin to feel the smallest spark of anger - stay away from the internet.

Also, this past week, I've also learned to make room for disappointment. Lots and lots of room for it. Since freshmen year, I have been waiting for this "senior ditch day", and none of the plans got to work because of parents. I was so disappointed to the point where I began breaking down. But at least I got to spend the day with friends.

And that's another thing. In this life, all that matters is the people you spend it with, not so much where. So now traveling the world seems a bit overrated to me, however, I still dream of traveling the world one day.

On Saturday I watched "Water for Elephants" with friends in theatres. It's about circus life during the Great Depression in America. Historical fiction is slowly starting to become fascinating to me.

Senior Ball is also coming up. Friends have been asked and I'm happy for all of them. To be honest, though, I've started to feel kind of lame that I haven't got a date. But then the stupid thing is that there isn't anyone I'd be willing to go with anyways, because I've always wanted my date to be someone who meant a lot to me - but no such person exists at the moment. So I'm just going to stag and not make any sense to myself. It'd better be one amazing night. But I'm not going to expect too much. That will just lead to disappointment, remember?

Oh yeah and it's the middle of May, yet it's been cold, windy, and rainy. What is up with the climate these days?

Today I finally got all my questions answered at De Anza. I can still apply for their Honors Program, so that's good. And I took this English placement test which was surprisingly easy. So I got placed in the highest English class. Yay.

Tyler Ward is amazing by the way.

& I can't wait to graduate.