I can't say I'm entirely disappointed. A part of me is, really. I guess I got my hopes up too high. Which sometimes, I need to realize is a bad habit. But deep down, I know that God knows what He's doing. His plan is the best for me. I guess I'm disappointed that all this time and money was spent on useless stuff. But who knows, maybe I'll be able to transfer to NYU and then to go England sometime or something! How exciting that sounds. And in ways I'll save a lot of money by not going to a four-year college first. I just have to not let any pride and reputation get to my head. And I have to remember that there are certainly very good reasons as to why God wants me to stay here. I highly, highly dought that i got into Berkeley. It's not like I'm alone or anything.
And today there were a couple times where I watned to burst into... well not "burst", but start an argument with certain people. So then I thought, are these things really worth arguing about? Fighting over a room when I didn't really need it, or trying to correct some facts when in the long term, I could care a lot less. So no, these petty quarrels are not worth having.
And none of my friends are online at the moment.... where are they?! When I need them the most. One of them better sign on soon.
I was thinking of not going to prayer meeting tomorrow, but I think I might because I need people to talk to.
I don't know what to think of the future anymore. But then again, it's not really mine to think of. I just pray that my sense of motivation does not go away.
This Friday, I am going to Blue Pearl with a friend, Ming! It'd better be fun... But the admission money goes to help victims of the Japan earthquake. So I guess that's what really counts.
I just was reminded, that God has really good timing.
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