Nostalgia

There are probably so few moments in my life when I feel nostalgic towards someone or something.  So little, in fact, that I can recall each memory clearly because that's just how rare nostalgia comes up for me.

The first time was the end of second grade.  I hated my second grade teacher in the beginning of the year, but somehow we ended up getting along very well throughout the year and I remember crying on the last day of school because I was sad that she wouldn't be my teacher anymore.

The second time was when I visited Taiwan in third grade and had to return to America.  I didn't want to come back to America, I was going to miss my cousins.

The third time(s) was when throughout high school, my parents would keep convincing my sister and I that we would be moving away suddenly, from all of our friends and our life here.  Continuous false alarms - do you know what that does to a mind of a teenager?  After that time, I became even more apathetic towards people and places - but I still had my moments of nostalgia.

The fourth time was when I decided to quit Maplestory.  I literally cried because I knew I had to stop playing as it was severely interfering with my academic life - not because I was sad I couldn't game anymore. All the adventures and conversations I had with friends I made through the game - I was going to miss that.  However, I did add a few of these friends through Myspace and Facebook, but now we don't really talk anymore.

The fifth time was when I had to leave the mission trip in Taiwan; the people we met there were amazing and fun people, and we all promised to keep in touch.  We all don't really talk now.

The sixth time was when a dear friend of mine had to move across the country.  I had had so much fun hanging out with her near the end of my junior year, so I was really sad she was going to leave.  We kept in contact for a while, sent each other mail, but now we don't talk anymore.

The seventh time - this is actually ongoing - my sister and my mother keep talking about selling the piano.  I've been the one using this piano all this time, even though I know it's not under my ownership.  But I have grown so fond of it, and yet they still want to sell it, even though I've been playing it for my own since the third grade.

The next time, I predict, is when I have to leave Valley Church.  Just thinking about leaving Valley Church breaks my heart a bit.  It's been such an enjoyable time to worship and fellowship with others who genuinely want to continue exploring the love of God and understand His will for each of them.  In my heart, I've always known that my time at Valley Church would be temporary - as I will be leaving off to 'actual' college soon and that when I graduate, I most likely won't come back to this city.  This is the church that has taught me to realize that in addition to God being an almighty and powerful being, his spirit took the form of a human once.  He was a person once, and still is!  In fact, the spirit that lives in him that comes from God is also in all of those that have accepted Him as their Father and Savior.  To be honest, my only real motivation for applying to SCU is to stay close to home so that I can continue attending Valley Church - just being with the people there have really helped me to grow spiritually.

Yet I know that any church is a great place for worship and fellowship and grow. After all, it's people that make life meaningful, not necessarily a location.  It's just going to be difficult starting over again, finding another worship team to join and hoping that they're genuine followers of Christ.  It's okay if they're not, too.  It's just that I've been blessed enough to play music and study the Bible with the same people, the same followers of Christ; it was nice to find them all in one place.

But you know, we'll see.  Maybe I will end up in SCU and staying here for the rest of my life.  Who knows?